From "I Love Because I Need You" to "I Don't Need You, So I Can Love You"
Self-sufficiency creates space for unconditionally.
“I can only love you unconditionally if I don’t need you. Think of it. How can I love you freely if I need something from you? Then, I would depend on you giving me what I am waiting for, and when you don’t, I will wonder, “Why do I love this person who is not giving me what I need?”
— Excerpt from My Mirror Soul, My Love, Myself
In conventional relationships, needing your partner is normal, whether to provide for you emotionally or financially.
There’s a story behind this: historically, people would get married to improve their social status. Over time, as we grew up at the collective level, this stopped being the main purpose of partnerships—yet, there’s still an ingrained (sometimes, subconscious) perception that partnerships are somewhat transactional.
This transactional interpretation isn’t always about asking the other person to supply you with material resources, but it can also be reflected in the form of emotional trade, where one partner is expected to bring in something the other doesn’t have and vice-versa.
At first sight, this seems like synergy and shared growth, but there’s one key difference:
The energetic imprint of the exchange.
The same action fueled by contrasting intentions leads to contrasting outcomes. This applies widely to partnerships:
The same Souls coming together as partners may either stay together harmoniously or repel each other depending on their current stage of alignment. It’s not about someone loving you enough to be with you, but whether you are energetically compatible given your awareness, core beliefs, and intentions.
Forcing a partnership with someone you aren’t currently aligned with isn’t proof of love, but rather a demonstration of how love and sacrifice can easily be mixed up, and how little we trust the timing of our Soul’s journey.
